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We as human beings, are connected through our pain and suffering. Though I don’t want to watch my children suffer – and I pray for healing and know that God moves and answers prayer and that prayer is powerful – I hear Him say suffering is necessary. Why? Although God will work all things together for the good for those who love him, (Romans 8:28 (NLT) And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.) He does not exempt us or our children from suffering because, after all, that is how we connect and that is how character is built.
My daughter, 8, has struggled with self esteem for quite awhile and although God is guiding me in new ways to help her, he has shown me recently, that her self-esteem problem is not a failure in my position as her mother (which I felt deeply and to my dismay that it was), but a character building difficulty that will produce in her empathy, compassion, and love for others who are struggling. Although her past has not been perfect, due to my mistakes and the mistakes of others, it’s Satan who would like me to believe I’ve failed – it’s God who is telling me to trust that He has her in His hands and knows what He is doing in her life. God knows her future and is preparing her even today for the purpose for which he has called her. (2 Timothy 1:9 (NKJV) who has saved us and called us with a holy calling, not according to our works, but according to His own purpose and grace which was given to us in Christ Jesus before time began.) She will not be a “mean girl” – but already has compassion for those who are hurting.
As women, we feel connected to each other when we are vulnerable. When we hear that each other’s marriages aren’t perfect, house is chaotic, and insecurities in all areas are running rampant, that's our connection. No one feels a deep connection to someone else because they seem “perfect” and their life looks put together. We connect through pain. “You had a father that suffered from psychosis? Me too.” “You wonder if you have any real gifts or talents to share? Me too.” “You wonder if anyone really cares to hear you talk about your pain? Me too.”
The foundation for our connection to each other is the commonality of human suffering. Even Jesus came to connect with us through our common suffering. Why should we be any different? (Hebrews 2:10 (NLT) God, for whom and through whom everything was made, chose to bring many children into glory. And it was only right that he should make Jesus, through his suffering, a perfect leader, fit to bring them into their salvation.)
