How many of us couldn't wait to reach adulthood? Wishing to put childhood behind us and move on to bigger and better things, experiences, freedom! Childhood wasn't easy...or fun. Sure there are bright spots that stand out to me but in reality, I don't have a very sunny filter on my growing up years. They were hard.
I didn't know Jesus nor did my family. The scales were heavily tilted in the direction of dysfunction and I was an only child. I can't imagine what life would have felt like to have a comrade by my side, fighting through the insanity, with me, for me, part of me.
My transition into adulthood, mercifully accompanied my decision to give my life, what was left of it, to Jesus. He had his work cut out for Him. I was a confused, untrusting, hurting soul and His patience with me was long.
Fast forward to many years spent with Him, knee deep into raising a family and all the crazy, busy, upside down that can be. With a full measure of laughter, tears, easy breezy and gut wrenching alleys this assignment of marriage and parenthood took us down, it was beautiful. It was ashes sprinkled on new ground.
My childhood and adulthood, are polar opposites. By design. The goal was to re-write my story with a happy ending and a whole lot of functional on each page leading up to the last chapter. God is good. His grace showed up in my failures, His strength was there in my weakness. He had proven that He was faithful and that by following Him all the days of my life, there was more, so much more than there ever could be without Him.
I had found the "more" I was searching for.
Then life got real hard. The kind of hard that breaks. The kind of hard that sends you reeling so far from what you know that you're not sure where you will land. It was in this place of disillusionment that my heart again questioned, "Isn't there more?" More promise? More joy?
God answered. He said to me in the kindest of voices that life is hard. There isn't a magic formula. Faith is confidence in what we hope for. Assurance in what we do not see. We won't always understand. Do not have idols. People, dreams, efforts can be idols, even if it's the happily ever after you've always fought for. Fight the good fight of faith. He taught me that it's a fight. Sometimes life is a fight. But it's worth fighting for. Even when it gets real hard. Pray Always. Keep praying. He proved that darkness brings Him into sharper focus, that we grow in pain and we walk in sync with Him best when He is carrying us.
He showed me that "He" is the more. When we feel overtaken by fear, loss, confusion, He is our Comrade, fighting through the insanity, with us, for us, part of us. We can choose to go it alone or go with Him. He offers us eternal life with Him. He gives hope. He shouts joy at sorrow and wraps comfort around hurt.
He is the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.
He wants to walk this journey with us. He longs to be our "more to this life" He is there at the top of the mountain where the sun is the warmest. He is there in the deepest valley where our bones catch a chill. I choose Him. I choose Him to write His goodness on every page of my life. I choose Him even when my heart is broken. I choose Him in the smiles and the tears.
Because He chose me, I can choose Him. Because I choose Him, there is more to this life...
"When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with Him in glory."
Colossians 3:4
Blessings,
Debbie Kirk
At-Home Study
Pray: ask God to reveal Himself to you through the scriptures, to help you receive the message He has specifically for you today.
Read: each passage twice in 2-3 different translations.
{Day1} John 14:1-14
{Day 2} Luke 4:42-5:11
{Day 3} John 6:26-40
{Day 4} Romans 6:15-23
{Day 5} 2 Corinthians 5:11-21
Observe: What is happening? What catches your attention? What is the message of this passage?What thoughts or feelings does it provoke?
Reflect: Why do these things catch your attention? Why do you feel or think certain things from reading it?
Apply: What does this say about God? What does it say about people? What does it say about God's plan for us? What does this mean for you? How can you apply what God is saying to you?
